#15.Night of the Lepus
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We couldn't tell if this was the most horrifying or most adorable thing we'd ever seen, until we learned the backstory. First terrifying detail:
it is real. There's even
video. This species of giant gray bunnies are bred by a guy in Germany ... for food.
If you choose to travel there, please don't return with photographs.
#14.Hannah Montana Gummi Cockswww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/cocktana.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
Speaking of disturbing food, what is clearly a gummi dong to our eyes is supposedly a guitar. But yes, the candy is real and yes, the flesh-colored phalluses are in every bag.
#13.Miners from Lilliput Explore the Interior of a Geodewww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/crystal.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
Okay, that doesn't even look like a good Photoshop. Yet, it's a real photo, taken in the Cave of Crystals in Mexico.
"FAAKE!!! ... AAKE!! ... AKE!"It's believed that the combination of mineral rich water and high temperatures resulted in super charged growth of the crystals. So Lex Luthor's plan in Superman Returns wasn't retarded after all.
#12.The Streets As Seen by Salvador Daliwww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/dali.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
This melting building is actually just a regular building covered in a huge tarp with the Dali-esque design painted on it. It's covering an apartment building undergoing renovation in Paris.
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Hats off to the French. In a single stroke they hide unsightly construction and fool all passersby into thinking someone spiked their espresso. Now if they could only figure out why people keep plowing their cars into buildings undergoing renovation in Paris.
#11.The Penis Extension Most Likely to Accidentally Castrate Youwww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/knife.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
While this looks like a pretty ingenious photoshop mocking the Swiss Army Knife manufacturers, the reality is far, far stupider: it's an actual Swiss Army Knife so huge as to be utterly useless for any task. It features a whopping 85 tools, including something that looks like it's for circumcising a baby.
On whole, the knife is nine inches wide and weighs two pounds. Here's an important outdoorsmen tip: When your knife has a handle three times wider than the blade is long, you're not carrying a knife, you're carrying a paperweight. One that's far more likely to stab you than anyone else.
#10.Recommended by Four out of Five Dentists to Ward off Attacks by Giant Asian Menwww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/asian.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
This billboard from Indonesia is a creative effort by the Formula Toothcare company to illustrate the fact that their toothpaste builds strong teeth, though there's a special bonus message for very young children: people in pictures can only come alive if they're very big and hungry enough to eat you.
#9.A Rare Shot of the Endangered African What the Fuck is Thatwww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/bird.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
That dayglo smiley hovering in the air in the middle of the jungle is actually a Bird of Paradise engaging in a completely ridiculous mating ritual. The markings are actually on the bird's chest feathers, which it can puff up to display the pattern.
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It'd be like being born with a shitty fad t-shirt permanently stuck to your body.
#8.German Figures Out the Secret to Levitation, Refuses to Sharewww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/levitation.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
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This seemingly faked photo can easily be explained away as sorcery. Unfortunately, it's actually a street performer named Johan Lorbeer, who stands in a harness hanging from a fake arm that's attached to the building.
The real magic is that the support system up there doesn't crush his nuts.
#7.The Jeff Foxworthy Estatewww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/foxworthy.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
This mess of tacky trailer homes isn't a Photoshop, but it's not a living complex either. It's a set for a play in Amsterdam. We were going to question the sense of using a trailer park for Anton Chekov's Ivanov, a 19th century Russian tragedy, until we read a synopsis. The play features down on their luck peasants, gun violence at weddings and a main character who's deep in debt and has some spousal difficulties. The only thing missing is stock car racing.
#6.The Miracle of Creation (During God's Teenage Years)www.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/dickberg.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
It's a real iceberg shaped like a pecker. We're going to leave it at that.
#5.A Water Park Designed by MC Escherwww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/fountain.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
What sucks about magic is the tricks are always incredibly lame once you know how they're done. This one is no different: it's supported by a pipe running up through the water.
#4.If a Million Raccoons Rummage Through a Million Trashcans...www.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/trash.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
From the "holy shit that must have taken forever" category, this sculpture is by some inventive artists making shadow art using garbage, carefully positioned to form the silhouette. We're sure the rats living in the pile see the whole thing as evidence of intelligent design.
#3.Home of the 404 Burgerwww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/404.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
Something this groan-worthy can only be real. A photo of this restaurant in China made the rounds over the summer during the Olympics.
Apparently restaurants there made a big push to get English on their signs to cater to tourists, but at least one business didn't have a single English-speaking friend they could ask. So they plugged it into Babelfish and ... you can imagine the rest of the story, which must involve at least one sign company who just didn't give a shit.
#2.Actually, a Translation Error Would Have Improved This Onewww.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/sweat.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
Man, just imagine all of the uses. Wait, do dogs even sweat? We smell bullshit here. This is actually a spinoff of a popular Japanese drink called Pocari Sweat. We don't know who Pocari is either, but we're going to go ahead and assume he's a Sumo wrestler.
#1."Our Top Notch Security Will Find the Cock in Your Luggage"www.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/psfreaks2/dildo.jpg" border="0" alt=""/>
If you're not sure what's so funny about the above image taken from a public Birmingham International Airport report, look in the lower left hand part of the suitcase.
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The document is still available on their website, (Click 2007-2008 Report) though you'll notice the mechanical dick has been crudely photoshopped away, in a bit of revisionism that reeks of Stalinism.
Sat Oct 17, 2009 7:05 am